love marriage or arrange marriage? definitly very tough to say which is better one. if you see the relationship between couples which consist financially strong , matured, deep understanding between his & her, spritual thoughts, egoless nature, helping attitude & finally small family back ground relationship has more success in love marriage. India has always had a long tradition of arranged marriages where the parents find the right match for their children. Due to our social structure, arranged marriages are more prevalent in our society and on the other hand, love marriages are considered as a taboo amongst people. marriage question which mostly puzzles the youth. Marriage is a relationship, which binds not only two souls together but also connects the two families. Marriage is a sacred bond between two souls, a relationship in which a male and a female promise to be companions for a life span after tying the nuptial knot. It brings significant stability and security in the relationships of human beings, which is otherwise incomplete. It is not only a union of two human beings but also of two families. Marriage to some extent cannot be successful without the blessings and consent of the members of the family. It doesn't matter whether it is a love marriage or an arranged marriage, the success of this relationship is all that matters. Love marriage has always been considered as the source of strong relation and satisfaction among spouses. The basic pillar of love marriage is the mental compatibility between the two individuals, making them closer to one another. However, Arrange marriages have always been considered most successful and strong. The biggest merit of Arrange marriage is that love simply develops in the relation with the passage of time.
The main reason behind this act of parents is to get their children married within the same cast, and also into good families. Honestly, there is nothing wrong with arranged marriages as long as the children are happy. On the other hand parents must understand their children if they love someone and want to go for a love marriage. Sometimes the children do not kknow what is right or wrong for them and in that case parents are forced to take drastic steps. Parents need to understand their children and children need to understand their parents point of view before any step is taken. Both love marriage and arranged marriage escorts with their own pros and cons. Here are some positive and negative points in both types of marriages.
Arranged Marriages offer security for women since they have their family backup whereas love marriages provide freedom and more independence. In love marriages, since the boy and the girl know each other for a long time, they know what to expect from one another, they are aware of each others weaknesses and strengths before tying the sacred knot. They get time to explore things related to each other’s nature, well before wedding. Hence it makes easier to develop a decent comfort level after marriage, with ease and thereby helps them to survive throughout the rocky phases of life. On the other hand, when a marriage is arranged by the parents, the two people do not know much about each other, they learn about and discover each other after marriage, sometimes their likes and dislikes might not match but it is too late by then. If all goes well then a love marriage can turn out to be a blessing else, it can be a disaster in which mainly the women have to suffer. In a love marriage the boy not only loves but also respects his partner whereas in most arranged marriages the female is only treated as a commodity that may be loved bot not necessarily respected.
In the above discussion love marriage has scored more than arranged marriage but here is a downfall of love marriage. There is one key to making a successful marriage that is probably one of the hardest things in the world to do. It's called compromise. In case of love marriage, since they have fallen in love before getting married, the level of expectations is at the higher end. And if the person expects more from his/her partner, this leads to lesser compromises. On the other hand, in case of arranged marriages, compromise and adjustments are the two major foundation pillars, because the married couple does not have any unbending notions from each other. The compromise factor might work wonders here, while in love marriages, that might prove to be yet another cause for clash. In a love marriage the boy and the girl have mostly seen the best of each other and so the expectations are very high from one another but the worst of each other is yet to come and when it comes, it leads to a disaster. Therefore the rate of divorce in love marriages has been constantly going up whereas arranged marriages are still being able to survive and rarely reach the point of divorce.
However, if we look at the demerits of both, we can simply observe that in love marriage, the best part of life is before marriage; and after marriage things suddenly change and “love” wipes out of the love marriage, making it just “marriage”. The biggest disadvantage of love marriage is that even after the marriage, couples do not consider that they have now married; they simply do not recognize their responsibilities after marriage and want to live the life of the lovers only, they feel it difficult to comprehend that their roles have been changed from lovers to husband and wife, they still expect the same from each other without realizing the reality, and this becomes the root of their problems. If we look at the problems of Arrange marriage, it has been observed that the biggest source of tension between the couples is that they do not feel the mental compatibility with their spouses. Even after the long span of time, they fail to recognize the likes and dislikes of each other and expectation gap simply widens.
Due to this factor, people consider arranged marriage as enduring and a cut above love marriage. This is such a topic, on which the discussion can go boundless. The bottom line is that be it an arranged marriage or a love marriage, both of the partners should realize that your spouse is not always going to be perfect. But tell your spouse every day that you love and appreciate him/her. There is no clear answer about which one is better than the other, it all depends on your personal circumstances and personality. However, a love marriage turned into an arranged one is the best thing that can happen. If a love marriage gets the consent of the family members as well then it can really turn into a beautiful relationship. At the same time arranged marriages can also be successful if both the girl and the boy are given the freedom to spend some time together and to decide for themselves if they one to get married to the person or not, after all, it is them who have to spend their whole lives together. Love, trust, loyalty, patience, respect, understanding, appreciating are some of the keywords of a successful marriage, if all this is their in a marriage then be it an arranged marriage or a love marriage, it is bound to be a happy and a everlasting one.
